Blubberwings, Gum Wrappers and Stinksap
by Cuban Sombrero Gal
Summary: [Oneshot] [NevillexLuna] Whilst looking for Blubberwings, Luna comes upon a very upset Neville. A very random conversation ensues, including Cornelius Fudge's houseelf torture, Neville's parents and Stinksap. [Winner of the Hideaway July Quill Contest] RR


**BLUBBERWINGS, GUM WRAPPERS AND STINKSAP**

Luna wandered serenely across the Hogwarts Grounds, her necklace of Butterbeer corks clanging against her chest with every step she took. A few people stared at her, but she didn't seem to notice. She ran her hands through her long scraggly tresses as she walked, checking for Wracklesprouts, which, according to her father's latest article for the Quibbler, had quite a thing for blondes.

Luna scurried past the Quidditch pitch, wondering why anyone would ride a broomstick when they could ride a Crumple Horned Snorcack instead. She was listening out for an odd sound, something rather like a badly tuned trumpet, like the noise she had heard this morning during Herbology. Blubberwings were famous for making this sort of noise. Apparently they were invading Hogwarts, and Luna was determined to make friends with them.

Luna took a detour behind the greenhouses, her ears peeled for any unusual noises, when she heard a sniffling. Neville Longbottom was sitting on an upturned bucket, stroking his Mimbulus Mimbletonia.

Luna quite liked Neville. He was one of the few students who didn't tease her about her love of reading the Quibbler or her radish earrings. He never called her 'Loony' either. That was the name her mother had coined for her, and despite her belief that her mother was living a contented life beyond one of those veils she had heard about, she didn't need any reminders of the woman's death.

"Hi," she said shyly, causing him to look up.

"Hi," he mumbled. His face was crimson and splotchy and he had obviously been crying.

"It's so unfair," he said.

"No it's not," she replied, "The Blubberwings are quite happy living on acorns"

Neville stared at her incredulously.

I'm talking about Bellatrix Lestrange and the other Death Eaters who escaped from Azkaban," he said, a tinge of some unidentified emotion creeping into his voice, "Don't you read the Daily Prophet?"

"Of course not! Everyone knows that Cornelius Fudge, aside from his love of turning goblins into pies is trying to torture house elves by force-feeding them sushi."

She ignored Neville, who was now goggling at her, a look of hilarity surpassing his features.

"Because of that, my dad and I are boycotting the Daily Prophet"

Neville snorted, and let out a small chuckle, his rather stout face shining brightly.

"You should join Hermione's vomit group," he said.

Luna shook her head as she spoke.

"No, she's very narrow-minded," she said matter-of-factly.

"She refuses to believe that the Crumple Horned Snorcacks exist, even though they're right in front of her eyes"

Neville nodded understandingly.

"I used to like her you know," he said, glancing warily at Luna as though afraid she was going to hurt him in some way for admitting this. He wiped a few stray tears from his face with his sleeve, which was already saturated.

Luna said nothing, but she felt a sharp, stabbing pain in her chest when he said this. She didn't know what it was, so she ignored it, figuring she would ask her father to send a full list of the creatures in the Hogwarts area able to cause heart palpitations as soon as possible.

"She's madly in love with Ron though," he said remorsefully, but then he brightened.

"Hermione's a nice girl. She always helps me in Potions when Snape picks on me, and she tells me my family would be proud of me if they saw how hard I try. If only my parents really could …"

Luna's protuberant blue eyes widened as Neville squeezed his Mimbulus Mimbletonia tighter and sighed.

"Are your parents beyond the veil like my mum?" she asked curiously.

Neville shuddered and shook his head, wiping away the lone tears seeping from the corner of his eye.

"Not unless you count the veil around their beds"

"Where they attacked by the Whipplewigner?'" she asked. "I heard that it's really dangerous if it gets your nose"

"No … no," he stuttered. "They're in St Mungo's"

His voice quavered slightly on the last word and Luna felt a pang of sympathy for her friend.

She squatted beside him in the dirt and put her arm around him. He squeezed her hand tautly and continued to talk.

"Bellatrix Lestrange tortured my parents with the Cruciatus Curse. They were sent into insanity."

Neville leaned over and picked up his bag, dusting the dirt off the bottom. He opened and groped around inside, before pulling out a handful of wadded-up gum wrappers. Luna gave him an inquisitive glance.

"They give me these," he said, "Mainly Mum. Gran said that she's chewed gum for as long as she can remember"

He stowed the wrappers back in his back and gave a nervous cough.

Luna grinned at him, and patted him on the shoulder.

"They'd be proud of you," she said fervently.

"Really?"

"Yes," she added. "You work hard during the DA meetings, and you're a great friend … one of the few I have. Most people think I'm odd."

Neville stared at her.

"You're cool," he said, "Even if you have some … unusual ideas"

He gaped and grabbed his Mimbulus Mimbletonia in a death grip, as, Luna leaned closer to him. Suddenly green jets of liquid shot from the plant's boils, splattering all over Luna and Neville who looked dazed. Luna pulled away, laughing loudly, and said solemnly,

"There was a Shillidag in your hair."

Neville's hand shot protectively towards his hair as Luna stared, unblinkingly at him.

"Well," she said, in a voice that suggested she knew nothing of the Stinksap that was currently giving her the aroma of rancid fertilizer, "I have to go find my socks, because someone's been taking them and hiding them"

And with that, she turned around and wandered off, leaving a very dishevelled and confused Neville staring after her, Stinksap dripping down his legs and into his shoes.

_Really, _Luna thought, _Neville was pretty cute, what with his round face that looked a lot like a Nargle's. Plus he doesn't laugh at me like everybody else. _

Maybe she was suffering one of those feelings her dad referred to as a crush.

_Then again, _she rationalised, _perhaps the Blubberwings have found me and are invading my brain._

They did, after all, have quite the penchant for Stinksap.

* * *

A/N: I saw OotP today, and after screaming blue murder for half-an-hour over the lack of Marauder action, I decided to write this challenge. Luna amazed me in this movie. This was written for the Light Fic in the Quill Challenge at the Hideaway. You had to write about a character's crush and include an acorn. This is my first Luna fic, so please feel free to tell me how I went. 


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